It’s not our fault, it’s a conspiracy, the left wing wanted it to happen. These are just some of the latest responses to the growing ecological disaster in the Gulf of Mexico as oil continues to spew from a deep well in the ocean. Plans are progressing this week to use containment domes to cover the well currently spewing 220,000 gallons of oil a day into the water.

But while scientists and ecologists work frantically to cap the well, spinmeisters and politicians are working frantically on something much more important — how to make hay out of the accident. Although, strangely, a lot of the Drill Baby Drill crowd have been nowhere to be seen this past couple of weeks.

But there are always a few brave souls ready to explain the matter properly to the ignorant masses.

Take Texas governor Rick Perry — governor of the state that recently revamped state textbooks to stress the superiority of American capitalism, question the Founding Fathers’ commitment to a purely secular government and present Republican political philosophies in a more positive light. So in keeping with that forward thinking attitude, Perry will attempt to explain the oil rig explosion and subsequent leak as, yes, just one of those things.

“From time to time there are going to be things that occur that are acts of God that cannot be prevented,” Perry said of the oil spill. So taking that logic to its natural conclusion, we shouldn’t bother with any of these pesky safety precautions, like say snow tires. If you want to drive around on mountain roads in the winter on bald summer tires, well if you’re unlucky enough to get in an accident, that’s an act of God. Thanks for clearing that up, Governor.

Then there’s Rush Limbaugh, king of right wing talk radio, who used the oil spill as an opportunity to suggest that the rig explosion was actually planned and caused by left wing environmentalists. 

“But this bill, the cap-and-trade bill, was strongly criticized by hardcore environmentalist wackos because it supposedly allowed more offshore drilling and nuclear plants, nuclear plant investment. So, since they’re sending SWAT teams down there, folks, since they’re sending SWAT teams to inspect the other rigs, what better way to head off more oil drilling, nuclear plants, than by blowing up a rig? I’m just noting the timing here.”

You see how simple everything is in Rush-ville? Oh, and also, it’s a totally natural thing.

“The ocean will take care of this on its own if it was left alone and left out there. It’s natural. It’s as natural as the ocean water is.”

See the old expression “like oil and water” doesn’t mean that they are different. Oil and water are the same.

Rush says so, so it must be true.

Then of course there is the classic response from the CEO of British Petroleum, Tony Hayward.

“This was not our accident. This was not our drilling rig. This was not our equipment. It was not our people, our systems or our processes. This was Transocean’s rig. Their systems. Their people. Their equipment.”

Pass that buck, Tony.

Meanwhile the US news media are whipping themselves into a frenzy comparing the oil spill to Hurricane Katrina, because well, they both happened on the Gulf Coast near New Orleans. It’s Obama’s Katrina is the current catch phrase that has the media so captivated. Because it’s just such a nifty way to make the oil spill more interesting. There was a disaster on the gulf coast during Bush’s presidency and now there’s one during Obama’s. So they must be exactly the same!

Although I haven’t yet heard Obama say “You’re doing a heck of a job, Tony.”

Keep in mind that while all this is happening, the oil industry to lobbying the Canadian government to loosen standards for offshore drilling off our coasts.

Let’s borrow another slogan from our friends to the south: Just say no.